In this post, we have compiled hilarious and funny Gordon Ramsay quotes and insults that are worth a read!
Gordon Ramsay is a very famous British chef, restaurateur, television personality, and author. He is known for his fiery personality and he frequently appears on cooking shows like “Hell’s Kitchen,” “MasterChef,” and “Kitchen Nightmares,” where he often criticizes and mentors contestants on their cooking.
Let’s read some of the best and funny Gordan Ramsay quotes and insults of all times.
Funny Gordon Ramsay Quotes & Insults
1. “This pork is so raw, it’s still singing ‘Hakuna Matata.’”
2. “For what we are about to eat, may the Lord make us truly not vomit.”
3. “You’re getting your knickers in a twist! Calm down!”
4. After trying Hawaiian pizza: “This isn’t a pizza, this is a mistake. This is an Italian tragedy.”
5. “The beef is so undercooked, it’s starting to eat the fucking salad!”
6. “My gran could do better! And she’s dead!”
7. “Cooking today is a young man’s game, I don’t give a bollocks what anyone says.”
8. “Don’t just stand there like a big f—ing muffin!
9. “You added so much salt and pepper I can hear the dish singing ‘Push It.’”
10. “Hey, panini head, are you even listening to me?”
11. “You put so much ginger in this, it’s a Weasley.”
12. “You do seriously surprise me… you surprise me how shitty you are.”
13. “You deserve a kick in the nuts.”
14. “You give me them anemic bits of shit, I’ll fucking throw them up your ass sideways.”
15. “Now fuck you, you fat useless sack of fucking Yankee doodle dandy shite. Fuck off will ya.”
16. “They say there is never a ugly baby, I think I just found one.”
17. “This lamb is so undercooked, it’s following Mary to school!”
18. “This pizza is so disgusting, if you take it to Italy you’ll get arrested.”
19. “If I tell you to get out there I don’t give a fuck if you’ve got thong up your crack.”
20. “You’re not a quitter? You’re not a fucking cook either.”
21. “This fish is so raw, he’s still finding Nemo.”
22. “I’ll get you more pumpkin, I’ll ram it right up your ass.”
23. “I wouldn’t trust you running a bath.”
24. “You used so much thyme, Dr. Who arrived in the Tardis to save us all.”
25. “This salad is so fresh it had to live with its aunty and uncle in Bel Air.”
26. “This is a really tough decision…’cause you’re both crap.”
27. “Hey, panini head, are you even listening to me?”
28. “Do I need to revive ceaser so you can practice using a fucking knife.”
29. “It’s so fucking raw it’s still got its wool on it!”
30. “If I relaxed, if I took my foot off the gas, I would probably die.”
31. “How to make your sister cry on her birthday? Bake her a mess.”
32. “Are we making a soup or trying to summon a demon?”
33. “Right, I’ll get you more pumpkin and I’ll ram it right up your fucking arse. Would you like it whole or diced?”
34. “I feel like I’ve just given birth. I guess that’s the placenta. It’s ghastly. “
35. “Right now, I’d rather eat poodle shit than put that in my mouth.”
36. “Chicken shitta masala.”
37. “This squid is so undercooked I can still hear it telling SpongeBob to fuck off.”
38. “I’ll get you more pumpkin, I’ll ram it right up your a—.”
39. “If one of my daughters’ boyfriends asked me for a pint in a couple years’ time and said, ‘Hey Mr Ramsay, I’m thinking of setting up this burger chain. Would you be interested in investing?’ . . . You can f— right, off. With a capital F! And two capital Fs at the end!”
40. “Looks like something out of a fucking sewer.”
41. “I wouldn’t trust you running a bath let alone a restaurant.”
42. “This looks like a fucked version of a science lab.”
43. “Dear lord for what I am about to receive, may I not be poisoned for the fourth time in four months.”
44. “This crab is so undercooked I can still hear it singing ‘Under the Sea!’”
45. “What are you? An idiot sandwich.”
46. “Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn’t f—ing cook it!”
47. “Forecast for tomorrow? 100% chance of tears.”
48. “Missy, clean your fucking glasses!”
49. “A sick bag maybe.”
50. “This fucking pigeon is that raw it can still fly.”
51. “Congratulations on the worst dish in this competition so far.”
52. “A lunchtime boob job.”
53. “Idiot pizza.”
54. “Looks like my great granddad’s left foot.”
55. “Anyone can open a restaurant. You just need a dinner party where everyone’s pissed and someone says, ‘Hey Tom, you should open a restaurant, this food’s delicious.’”
56. “This soufflé has sunk so badly James Cameron wants to make a film about it.”
57. “If I can give you one strong piece of advice, when you go away for that romantic weekend, whatever you do, do not accept or take the upgrade to the honeymoon suite.”
58. “The problem with Yanks is they are wimps.”
59. “I swim like a fish, and I have an amazing kick.”
60. “Looks like a toxic scum on a stagnant pool.”
61. “There’s enough garlic in here to kill every vampire in Europe.”
62. “This fish is so Frozen that it is still singing ‘Let it Go!’”
63. “That’s limper than my granddad’s d***.”
64. “Masterpiece??? Masterbate….”
65. “The chicken is pinker than your fucking lipstick.”
66. “I’ve never, ever, ever, ever, ever met someone I believe in as little as you.”
67. “Chefs are nutters. They’re all self-obsessed, delicate, dainty, insecure little souls, and absolute psychopaths. Every last one of them.”
68. “I’m Gordon Ramsay, for goodness sake; people know I’m volatile.”
69. “You guys cook like grandpas fuck. “
70. “The salmon is raw and the chicken is as dry as a fucking camel’s ass in a fucking desert storm.”
71. “You used so much oil, the U.S. want to invade the f—ing plate.”
72. “You’ve got to kiss arse to get somewhere, to learn. Clock-watchers are no good at kissing arse.”
73. “I shoot from the hip.”
74. “They say cats have nine lives. I’ve had 12 already and I don’t know how many more I’ll have.”
75. “I want my kids to see me as Dad, for God’s sake, not a television personality.”
76. “This chicken is so uncooked that a skilled vet could still save him!”
77. “It’s a kitchen you donut.”
78. “Looks like a seagull splattered all over your pork.”
79. “DIVORCE.”
80. “I train my chefs completely different to anyone else. My young girls and guys, when they come to the kitchen, the first thing they get is a blindfold. They get blindfolded and they get sat down at the chef’s table… Unless they can identify what they’re tasting, they don’t get to cook it.”
This sums up the best and funniest Gordon Ramsay quotes and insults that reflect his fiery personality and his passion for cooking.
Which of these funny Gordon Ramsay quotes and insults made you laugh the most?
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